rheafandomcom-20200215-history
Noriaki Kakyoin
"I am the terror in the night, the face of a thousand maws and eyes, the shadow in the light. Also where's your toothpaste?" Noriaki Kakyoin is the main villain of the Rhea Cinematic Universe. He's responsible for 90% of every single bad thing that's happened in Rhea's day to day life. He is an unstoppable menace and cannot die. Appearance Childhood Kakyoin didn't wear clothes for the first 37 years of his childhood, he had an aura of shadow and plague wrapped around him as of a corset, people who laid eyes on him turned to ash within seconds. Adulthood Kakyoin wears a shitty bright green school uniform that he loves for some dumb reason. He has his cherry earrings to match his hair color and his love for the fruit, but nobody likes his appearance GOD I HATE THIS GUY Personality "I like to comb my hair with a comb that's missing teeth as it accentuates my hair noodle. I use a moisturizer on my ears because it enhances the cherry color of my earrings" - Kakyoin talking to the wall. Kakyoin has the personality equivalent of getting mauled by a bear in the middle of the Interstate. He's incredibly sneaky, often breaking into Rhea's house to steal her toothpaste, drink her mouthwash then spit it back into her container... One time he replaced her conditioner with Mayonnaise and that was extremely gross. He's cursed in every sense of the word, he has many lives spanning across the many universes, sometimes he's an ogre named K'ak Yowin, sometimes he's a world ending threat with the name Kakyoin. He hates everything this world has to offer. He likes some things like torturing Rhea and someone else, but mostly he just gets high off elephant and horse tranquilizers and does shit. Supernatural Abilities and Powers Immortality Kakyoin was granted immortality at the ripe age of 1, as some evil force knew he would be the perfect vessel. It didn't kick in until after DIO "Killed" him, as he had to rise from the ashes of his water tower self to return as this force of chaos. Cryptid Energy Kakyoin has the cursed energy of twelve Bigfoots and 37 Mothmen combined, he is an unstoppable force and will never stop doing petty crimes and annoyances. Universe bridging Kakyoin has many lives, as mentioned he was once an ogre, one time he was a world ending threat that had his own campfire tale about him. He's able to slip in and out of these universes, adding to his godlike power. A list of some annoyances Kakyoin has done * Put mayonnaise in Rhea's conditioner * Ate bugs infront of her * Made her type something fully in rhymes * Keyed someones car and blamed it on her * Stole elephant tranquilizers that were in her cabinet for some reason * Bit the teeth off of Rhea's comb so he could use it * Gargled mouthwash and spit it back into Rhea's container * Licked the earwax out of Rhea's ear one time in a movie theater * Cried in Rhea's room because he lost his Spongebob Toothbrush * Broke Rhea's window like 37 times * Interrupted the Grand Ball * Made a shitty Twitch.tv channel where he gets 12 viewers and does failed backflips until he passes out. * Eats hotdogs lengthwise up somehow, extending his mouth to the north. * Was arrested for public urination, and blamed it on Rhea. * Told everyone that Rhea is a furry * Told Rhea that if she sold fake passes to Disney World for 100 dollars each and gave him the money, that she would be flown to the Khajiit Planet, and of course she complied. * Ambushed Rhea by hiding in the bushes over a dozen times. * Shit the bed in Rhea's guest room. * Slept for 35 hours straight once and drank Rhea's entire supply of bottled water to quench his thorst. Trivia * Kakyoin's real name is Greg * Kakyoin teamed up with Shadow the Hedgehog to corrupt K'aidel's life, but since he sent Shadow to an alternate universe, it didn't really matter. * Kakyoin has never met Todd Howard despite being in the same evil clan as him. * Kakyoin doesn't think airplanes are real. * Kakyoin breathes through his ears. * Kakyoin Is Cocaine. * If you say Kakyoin 3 times in the mirror with no lights on he shows up. * He has a Flying Kayak * Kakyoin has a sitcom with his husband, Rohan. * He killed the Lorax... * Kakyoin chooses to speak like a man but his language is far older.. * Kakyoin has Skunk Ape energy. * He has rabies. * He possesses hosts... * Kakyoin is more powerful than Araki * His name was SUPPOSED to be Tenmei but he said "No." * He has a bad cousin named Wesley Mew Mew from Mew Mew Power. * He has a cursed niece named Kikki from Mew Mew power!